The Trip (IKEA debrief)

There’s no keeping you in suspense with the IKEA debrief because, reader, I have to write this while it’s still fresh in my mind to make sure that I never. ever. think that a ‘quick’ round trip to Vancouver in a day – on the ferry, with a detour to IKEA and 4 children, is a good idea, ever again. (Horror emoji)

I mean we had a easy-ish ferry trip out there. Check.

Obviously we didn’t want to stand in the sunshine quietly watching the coastline. We wanted to sit in a perfectly preserved interior from the 1970s complete with school dinner aroma and work on a mermaid sticker book.

A lovely visit with family. Check. 

You may notice: the photo above shows the exact moment at which our toddler decided to stop having fun. 

..which is the moment we struck out for IKEA. If there existed a time lapse video for this trip. Me; arriving with such hope. Us all; exiting in a heap.

Amidst that time-lapsed two hours: a terrible nappy/diaper rash caused by excessive fruit-eating (me, earlier, ‘he loves watermelon! he really loves it!’) which resulted in a miserable (loudly miserable) baby. And a sudden onset ear infection for our 7 year old. 

We were the family to avoid, in IKEA and on the ferry home. In fact I think we caused some domestic disputes in IKEA as a hipster couple found themselves in step with us at every turn and, I surmised, began to buckle under the strain of the noise (enough to make everyone’s nerves jangle, even Canadian hipsters?).

We made it out of IKEA – full report forthcoming – and to the ferry. Here’s where it got real: sorry, the 6pm ferry is full. Sorry, you might not make it on your reserved 7pm ferry – as your car is now oversized with the straining IKEA-filled roofbox on the top. Oh. We might have to wait for a (delayed) 8pm ferry. Just a casual 3hour delay, with children in pain and desperate for bed.

But the booth attendant took pity on us and, after directing us to the right queue (abandon all hope), just as we started to leave she suddenly revised her instruction and sent us to the priority lane for the 6pm full ferry. 

If I could send the booth attendant a message it would be of gratitude and enduring love. 

Anyway we made it home to sudocreme and infant Tylenol and bed and everyone’s feeling much happier today.

Sorry, did you just want to know about the IKEA purchases? 

They didn’t have the shelf brackets (sad times). 

These shelves remain elusive

They may have had the nice wooden frame but by that point I was in an altered state only able to keep walking towards the exit. 

We came away with 4 cuddly toys:

In a moment of comic relief I rounded the corner clutching one of these and the baby, and mr tMatM appeared at the same time clutching four of these and the older children. Great minds. (Desperate minds).

Cushion inserts, picture frames, glasses, candles, check.

And, one of the tray tables that has been getting a lot of attention in the press but that I wasn’t keen on online:

It’s actually quite lovely. The Washington Post agrees. 

A tale of IKEA, ferry trips and 4 children. We survived in one piece, perhaps a little bit humbled by the experience. The children have been playing ‘ikea’ ever since and keep asking when we are going to return, but I have a sneaking suspicion we might not repeat that particular outing any time soon. 

tMatM x


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